One of the reasons I keep holding on is because every dream I remember deals with you. I can't even count how many times these dreams keep me laying in my bed before I get up wondering why I just had that dream or what is it even trying to tell me.. It's kind of like false hope and I know I shouldn't be using dreams as an excuse. I guess it's because it's like a little getaway from reality. It's a fantasy world I secretly wish would happen in real life. Idk, I really think I'm going crazy. *Sigh -_-

I emotionally / mentally drain myself with this shit... no bueno