I wish I wasn't like this. Things would be easier. It's both our faults...

I am still waiting for the day I could naturally admit that word..

I. miss. you. people. But I think it's pathetic. No use in trying anymore.

Ugh. Dammit Ma, why are you not here anymore. Things would be so much better with you around. -__-

-________________- That's supposed to be me... Damn what the fuck is going on.

I felt nostalgic today and decided to look through my high school year book. Of course I looked at my senior picture. Oddly enough.. I just stared at it. I felt like I didn't know who that person was and all I kept thinking was.. Wow. Just within a year, so much has changed that I could even tell just by looking at my senior picture. I'm not the same chick I used to be.

Some things never change.

Sometimes I make up scenarios of history repeating itself but then I remember why I'd never let that happen again. PSH.

Uh, I need guy friends. Union dudes are kinda sorta really whack. Except the very few chosen ones. I miss my flursh boys from last summer. I wish east brunswick was closer :(

O m g my poor eyebrows T_T I don't think I'll be getting them threaded by that lady ever again. I told her to keep it thick and she did the complete opposite T______________T Not doing anything to my eyebrows till it grows out again. My eyebrows were already shaped before too! Ugh. I don't know why but I'm not even mad. I'm just like wow... I guess cus I know I can cover it up but still.. I'm an insecure mess to begin with. Now I have to be like a chonga and outline / color them even more. Man, I've been growing them out for a while to keep them thick and nicely shaped too, mehhhh, Fuck my life and shit. -_- My hair grows pretty fast so I'm hoping it will for my eyebrows TT_TT

/end rant -_-

"But you and I had a trial of tribulations which were ups and downs. And look at us where we are now. Still in each others company." Although this was beyond gay, a poorly constructed sentence esp since the saying is "trials & tribulations," it's still true.


Hoo haa. I really don't know if I'm a good person / friend but I try to believe I am.. I'm one tough cookie, man. I feel like people always try to put shit in my head. Sorry, I'm not like that and I don't automatically take sides. I can hold my own ground. I'll believe what I want to believe based on my personal experiences. I've always been the friend people can vent to, but please don't try to pull some dumb sht and try make me believe everything. I don't fall for that kind of bs.

Holy wow. If this doesn't seriously open your eyes or give you some kind of reality check of what kind of person I am in your life / who the fck I've been all this damn time.... then I seriously don't know what will.


Seriously, I think this shit just LOVES to follow me even when I'm not doing anything. Lord, if you're trying to tell me something... please do it another way because I feel like things are about to get complicated. -_-

& out of all the people in the world it just HAD to be me. Why oh Why oh Why.

Stronger & better & wiser. I learned my lesson. I'm different from the girl I used to be even if I'm the only one that knows. I'm done with immature baby shit and focusing on what's best. I'm doing me & you definitely aren't getting the same attention I used to give. Know that. I'm happy where I stand.

Today was actually quite refreshing.