Feels so good to actually start letting go. A friend told me it takes 2 & 1/2 months or more to move on....
Thursday, December 30, 2010
stayed single almost the whole year?
um..... yeah.
were involved in something you’ll never forget?
yup.
tripped over a coffee table?
nope i don't think so.
came close to losing your life?
nah.
saw one of your favorite bands/artists live?
saw wiz & mac miller todayy, holler
did something you regret?
can't say i regret it cus i know in that moment it was something i wanted & chose to do.
->2010: friends and enemies
did you meet any new friends this year?
yup!
did you hate anyone?
nah, but btchz will be btchz tho & i'll get annoyed.
did you lose any friends?
at some points we'd drift away but we always end up together again.
->2010: your birthday!
did you have a cake?
yeup!
did you get any presents?
yeah.
did you get what you wished for last year?
i don't remember what i wished for :( lol
->2010: all about you
did you change at all this year?
definitely got a different mindset.
did you change your style?
kinda? sorta? idk really, haha
were you in school?
graduated hs & first sem. of college, holla
did you get good grades?
it was just one class that i got C+ & i'm mad as fck -_-
did you drive?
yup!
did you own a car?
yeeerp.
did anyone close to you give birth?
umm, nope.
did you go on any vacations?
camping, cali & myrtle beach :)
would you change anything about yourself now?
I just want to be skinny.. that is all...
did you dye your hair?
yup! lost my hairginity.. lol
->2010: wrap up:
was 2010 a good year?
very good year.
do you think 2011 will top 2010?
2011 got big shoes to fill.
best thing that happened in 2010?
summer 2010, hands down.
in the year 2010 i confess that i….
kissed in the snow?
nope.
in the parking lot? at the beach ? in secret?
parking lot & in secret.. lmfao
had your heart broken?
it ached but i don't consider it broken.
painted a picture?
nah, lol
wrote a poem?
nah, just wrote way too much.
ran a mile?
i think? haha
visited a foreign country?
nope.
cut in a line of waiting people?
haha yeah!
told someone you were busy when you weren’t?
yes =X
cooked a disastrous meal?
mm, don't think so.
lied about how old you were?
nope.
cried yourself to sleep?
yeah.
in 2010 i….
broke a promise?
i don't think so.
lied?
unfortunately.
disappointed someone close?
yes -_-
hid a secret?
ugh, yeah.
pretended to be happy?
most likely.
slept under the stars?
nah, that woulda been cute tho.
met someone who changed your life?
mm, nah.
changed your outlook on life?
definitely.
sat home all day doing nothing?
yes!
lost something expensive?
YES. #($)@ :( :( :(
learned something new about yourself?
all the time.
tried something you normally wouldn’t try and liked it?
most likely, haha.
made a change in your life?
yes.
found out who your true friends were?
i've always known.
met great people?
yeup.
stayed up til sunrise?
yup.
cried over the silliest thing?
sigh, yes, haha
had friends who were drifting away from you?
sadly.
spent most of your money on food?
fckin sushi!
gotten sick?
yeup.
liked more than 5 people at the same time?
no.
became closer with a lot of people?
some, yeup.
um..... yeah.
were involved in something you’ll never forget?
yup.
tripped over a coffee table?
nope i don't think so.
came close to losing your life?
nah.
saw one of your favorite bands/artists live?
saw wiz & mac miller todayy, holler
did something you regret?
can't say i regret it cus i know in that moment it was something i wanted & chose to do.
->2010: friends and enemies
did you meet any new friends this year?
yup!
did you hate anyone?
nah, but btchz will be btchz tho & i'll get annoyed.
did you lose any friends?
at some points we'd drift away but we always end up together again.
->2010: your birthday!
did you have a cake?
yeup!
did you get any presents?
yeah.
did you get what you wished for last year?
i don't remember what i wished for :( lol
->2010: all about you
did you change at all this year?
definitely got a different mindset.
did you change your style?
kinda? sorta? idk really, haha
were you in school?
graduated hs & first sem. of college, holla
did you get good grades?
it was just one class that i got C+ & i'm mad as fck -_-
did you drive?
yup!
did you own a car?
yeeerp.
did anyone close to you give birth?
umm, nope.
did you go on any vacations?
camping, cali & myrtle beach :)
would you change anything about yourself now?
I just want to be skinny.. that is all...
did you dye your hair?
yup! lost my hairginity.. lol
->2010: wrap up:
was 2010 a good year?
very good year.
do you think 2011 will top 2010?
2011 got big shoes to fill.
best thing that happened in 2010?
summer 2010, hands down.
in the year 2010 i confess that i….
kissed in the snow?
nope.
in the parking lot? at the beach ? in secret?
parking lot & in secret.. lmfao
had your heart broken?
it ached but i don't consider it broken.
painted a picture?
nah, lol
wrote a poem?
nah, just wrote way too much.
ran a mile?
i think? haha
visited a foreign country?
nope.
cut in a line of waiting people?
haha yeah!
told someone you were busy when you weren’t?
yes =X
cooked a disastrous meal?
mm, don't think so.
lied about how old you were?
nope.
cried yourself to sleep?
yeah.
in 2010 i….
broke a promise?
i don't think so.
lied?
unfortunately.
disappointed someone close?
yes -_-
hid a secret?
ugh, yeah.
pretended to be happy?
most likely.
slept under the stars?
nah, that woulda been cute tho.
met someone who changed your life?
mm, nah.
changed your outlook on life?
definitely.
sat home all day doing nothing?
yes!
lost something expensive?
YES. #($)@ :( :( :(
learned something new about yourself?
all the time.
tried something you normally wouldn’t try and liked it?
most likely, haha.
made a change in your life?
yes.
found out who your true friends were?
i've always known.
met great people?
yeup.
stayed up til sunrise?
yup.
cried over the silliest thing?
sigh, yes, haha
had friends who were drifting away from you?
sadly.
spent most of your money on food?
fckin sushi!
gotten sick?
yeup.
liked more than 5 people at the same time?
no.
became closer with a lot of people?
some, yeup.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Saturday, December 25, 2010
I don't see you around very often & when I do, a million thoughts run through my head. It's quite funny to think about the things we went through. Maybe someday we'll really cross paths and catch up because I honestly do wonder about you time to time - how you're doing & if you're okay because you always showed how much you cared about me and I really don't come across people like that. At times I even find myself missing our friendship and having someone to talk to all the time.
I'm finding myself to be pathetic for still missing you especially since the year is quickly coming to an end. I am a hypocrite because I won't even do anything about it...
Big mothafckin sigh..
Why did any of this have to happen... ugh, I must keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason.
Big mothafckin sigh..
Why did any of this have to happen... ugh, I must keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Finally did something different with myself & it feels good. Feels good to get most of my bad ends out & just do something different to my hair because I've always looked the same. I'm still getting used to it, but I do love it & tin did a great job. Some change is good. I'm still the same person yet this new look just helps me move forward from all the shit that happened to me in the past month. And shit, I'm 18 now. I'm tryna do it big(ger?) loll. Can't wait to do tattoos & piercings with the girls. 2011 has big shoes to fill, holla.
I'm not sure how long this will take.. it could be months or even years. I wish it didn't even have to end up like this, but all i know is that whatever the outcome is.. it'll be something i need and what's best for me at that time.
I've been down this road before and yeah I skidded but forget it.
Damn I wonder why I never learned my lesson..
Sunday, December 19, 2010
stealing michelle's survey as usual cus i have nothing better to do
Are you an official couple with the last person you kissed?
i wouldn't mind.. hahah
Do you remember who you had feelings for December 2009?
yes which was no one.
Is there that one guy/girl that you’ll always have feelings for no matter what?
eh.
You’ve just had an argument with the guy/girl you like, you walk away. Do you want them to leave you alone or come after you?
um, i think it'd be nice if they came after me. actually i think it depends what happened.
Who were you last in a car with?
lauren.
What color was the last pill you took?
white.
Be honest, are you starting to gain feelings towards anyone?
nope.
Are you losing feelings towards anyone?
mmnope.
Who did you like in ‘09? First and Last name please.
No One.
The person you fell hardest for, do you still care about them?
of course i still care.
Who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally?
family.
Sex ruins relationships, right?
i think it depend where the relationship stands & if you guys are both ready.
How many tattoos do you have? And how many do you want?
none for now!
What’s something you’re looking forward to?
christmas & the rest of winter break, holla
Do you think it’s a bunch of bull shit when people say “I have no regrets”?
nah.
Who got you the jewelry you’re wearing?
parents & lauren.
Do you get scared during scary movies?
yeup, love them tho, haha.
How do you feel right now?
like a new woman. holla
Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?
RN nurse, sup! & get my master's but idk what i wanna specialize in yet.
What are you wearing on your feet?
my uggs :)
You wake up, all your hair is gone, your first reaction?
bawllll hard as hell.
When was the last time you saw someone attractive?
wow, i don't even remember. hahah
You’ve had sex with over 12 people, haven’t you?
yes, because i am such a slut...
Are you planning to get knocked up or knock someone up by age 17?
no thanks. i'm 18 now anyway.
Have you ever been completely alone with a girl/boy in a bedroom?
yeup.
Would you ever get a lip tattoo?
sure.
Are you an official couple with the last person you kissed?
i wouldn't mind.. hahah
Do you remember who you had feelings for December 2009?
yes which was no one.
Is there that one guy/girl that you’ll always have feelings for no matter what?
eh.
You’ve just had an argument with the guy/girl you like, you walk away. Do you want them to leave you alone or come after you?
um, i think it'd be nice if they came after me. actually i think it depends what happened.
Who were you last in a car with?
lauren.
What color was the last pill you took?
white.
Be honest, are you starting to gain feelings towards anyone?
nope.
Are you losing feelings towards anyone?
mmnope.
Who did you like in ‘09? First and Last name please.
No One.
The person you fell hardest for, do you still care about them?
of course i still care.
Who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally?
family.
Sex ruins relationships, right?
i think it depend where the relationship stands & if you guys are both ready.
How many tattoos do you have? And how many do you want?
none for now!
What’s something you’re looking forward to?
christmas & the rest of winter break, holla
Do you think it’s a bunch of bull shit when people say “I have no regrets”?
nah.
Who got you the jewelry you’re wearing?
parents & lauren.
Do you get scared during scary movies?
yeup, love them tho, haha.
How do you feel right now?
like a new woman. holla
Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?
RN nurse, sup! & get my master's but idk what i wanna specialize in yet.
What are you wearing on your feet?
my uggs :)
You wake up, all your hair is gone, your first reaction?
bawllll hard as hell.
When was the last time you saw someone attractive?
wow, i don't even remember. hahah
You’ve had sex with over 12 people, haven’t you?
yes, because i am such a slut...
Are you planning to get knocked up or knock someone up by age 17?
no thanks. i'm 18 now anyway.
Have you ever been completely alone with a girl/boy in a bedroom?
yeup.
Would you ever get a lip tattoo?
sure.
Friday, December 17, 2010
It still kills me. I'm still hurting. I still seek answers. I still don't know what to do. I still can't find the right words. I am still confused. I am still stuck. I still continue to ask the Lord for strength everyday. I am still lost.
I've really hit a breaking point this past month and I feel like I've just been getting tested left and right. I know life isn't going to get any easier for me so I'm really trying to hold myself up. Going through hardships really makes you so much more thankful for all your happy moments.
Why have I built up these walls so high? Why am I so guarded? Why do I shut people out? It's because I have been hurt so much by death that I try to avoid any ways possible of getting hurt again. It still puzzles me to realize how much this has impacted me and it took me 5 years to figure out the reason why I am so guarded. I fear rejection and getting hurt as much as I did all those years ago. I push away people and deny anything to do with relationships because I have manipulated myself to believe that I am not meant for them and that no one will make an effort to realize how much of a good heart I have if I don't live up to their 'physical standards'. It's so difficult for me to love others, relationship wise, because I do not love myself and every time I try to accept myself - I am back to square one, picking out every flaw and comparing myself to all these other pretty skinny girls I'll never compare to in other people's eyes.
Sigh. The one thing that made you so happy at one point can be the same thing that breaks you into pieces. So maybe the reason I'm so hurt is because maybe, just maybe, I thought I was good enough. And to see how things played out, I find myself back to believing that I wasn't good enough and maybe I'll just never be good enough. Maybe one day you will realize that I was / am good enough but it'll be far too late. So many opportunities and chances, but you were too oblivious and caught up to even realize that. I've taken my risks only to fall down over and over again. Another lesson learned. Another used to be. Another memory. Another story to bring up when I'm older to laugh and giggle about.
So here I am.. that same girl. That same girl who has the heart to forgive someone, the same person numerous times & people because I believe that yes, everyone makes mistakes. I forgive, but I never forget especially the way people have made me feel whether good or bad. The same girl to avoid confrontation because I don't want to lose a friendship over something insignificant. The same girl to just let things go because I'm nice enough to give people who matter second chances even if I am still hurting so much in the inside. The same girl to make excuses for people even though they have done me wrong because I believe that everyone has good inside of them. The same girl that's been taken for granted because I am so lenient, a pushover, forgiving and nice to people I truly care about. I wish people didn't have to take my kindness as my weakness..
I don't know where I'm going with any of this mumbo jumbo spread out thoughts, but I just needed to vent without saying the words - like, umm, etcetc - I needed a constant flow and this is the only place I could actually let words spill out. Emotionally exhausted. Lord, please give me the strength to keep moving forward.
Moving along and moving on...
I've really hit a breaking point this past month and I feel like I've just been getting tested left and right. I know life isn't going to get any easier for me so I'm really trying to hold myself up. Going through hardships really makes you so much more thankful for all your happy moments.
Why have I built up these walls so high? Why am I so guarded? Why do I shut people out? It's because I have been hurt so much by death that I try to avoid any ways possible of getting hurt again. It still puzzles me to realize how much this has impacted me and it took me 5 years to figure out the reason why I am so guarded. I fear rejection and getting hurt as much as I did all those years ago. I push away people and deny anything to do with relationships because I have manipulated myself to believe that I am not meant for them and that no one will make an effort to realize how much of a good heart I have if I don't live up to their 'physical standards'. It's so difficult for me to love others, relationship wise, because I do not love myself and every time I try to accept myself - I am back to square one, picking out every flaw and comparing myself to all these other pretty skinny girls I'll never compare to in other people's eyes.
Sigh. The one thing that made you so happy at one point can be the same thing that breaks you into pieces. So maybe the reason I'm so hurt is because maybe, just maybe, I thought I was good enough. And to see how things played out, I find myself back to believing that I wasn't good enough and maybe I'll just never be good enough. Maybe one day you will realize that I was / am good enough but it'll be far too late. So many opportunities and chances, but you were too oblivious and caught up to even realize that. I've taken my risks only to fall down over and over again. Another lesson learned. Another used to be. Another memory. Another story to bring up when I'm older to laugh and giggle about.
So here I am.. that same girl. That same girl who has the heart to forgive someone, the same person numerous times & people because I believe that yes, everyone makes mistakes. I forgive, but I never forget especially the way people have made me feel whether good or bad. The same girl to avoid confrontation because I don't want to lose a friendship over something insignificant. The same girl to just let things go because I'm nice enough to give people who matter second chances even if I am still hurting so much in the inside. The same girl to make excuses for people even though they have done me wrong because I believe that everyone has good inside of them. The same girl that's been taken for granted because I am so lenient, a pushover, forgiving and nice to people I truly care about. I wish people didn't have to take my kindness as my weakness..
I don't know where I'm going with any of this mumbo jumbo spread out thoughts, but I just needed to vent without saying the words - like, umm, etcetc - I needed a constant flow and this is the only place I could actually let words spill out. Emotionally exhausted. Lord, please give me the strength to keep moving forward.
Moving along and moving on...
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I miss warm weather. I miss cardigan weather. I MISS SUMMER. I miss you. I miss cali. I miss the beach. I miss my friends. I miss being a senior. I miss you. I miss my cousins. I miss the philippines. I miss being a kid again. I miss having a boo. I miss being so carefree. I miss taking pictures like there's no tomorrow. I miss you. I miss everything, weh ;(
Monday, December 13, 2010
I don't know how I feel towards anything right now. I feel like this one situation has put me through so much bullshit that it caused me to be so emotionless. I used to care so much, but I find myself slowly caring less about certain things day after day. I wish things didn't turn out the way it did, but I must keep in my mind that everything happens for a reason. Thank you for reminding me that I was never good enough.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
"haha aiight dont be gay, you got anyone special this xmas ;)?" something i was just asked & sadly i'll have to pathetically respond no because i am forever alone and i am a loser who is "picky" yadayadayada :( one day i'll be cuddling in cold weather with ma boo and a cup of hot chocolate! booyah. but for now, i will continue to beat myself up for what happened to me these past couple of months and miss people / things of my past, sigh! don't worry, i'm a strong girl.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
who introduced you to your boyfriend/girlfriend?
what's a boyfriend?
do you believe exes can be friends?
yup!
do you eat breakfast daily?
usually or atleast i try to.
is green your favorite color?
nope, but i do like.
is there anyone you couldn’t live without?
yup.
who were you with the last time you went to the movie theater?
a bunch of fuckin people to watch paranormal 2 ...
what do you usually do when the clock turns 11:11?
probably doing some shit.
do you like to cuddle?
it's cute.
do you like your cell phone?
yes i do!
do you prefer to call or text?
text / bbm, hehe
do you think someone misses you?
nope.
do you love where you live?
i love that it's not too far from the city & the beach.
what were you doing 12 am last night?
falling asleep.
would you go out in public looking like you do now?
sure, i just came back from trixia's anyway.
so, what do you want for your birthday?
it passed already!
has anyone ever sang to you?
yes.. hahah oh my.
do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?
doubt it. forever alone!
how was your weekend?
just started. bummed out with 3 of my girls so that was nice!
do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
yup!
how do you feel right now?
tiredd.
does any part of your body hurt right now?
mmm nope.
are you a mean person?
shit, i can be.
interested in anyone at the moment?
nope. forever alone yet again!
so, what if you married the last person you kissed?
hahah, i mean like he was cute..
have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
i guess you could say that.
is there someone you want to fix things with?
yeah. sigh.
do you plan on moving out within the next year?
nope.
what are you listening to at the moment?
the sound of central air.
what color shirt are you wearing?
2010 shirt with my prom hoodie, haha.
can you leave the house without makeup?
sure.
do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
i don't think so, lol
what was the first thing you did when you woke up?
turn off my alarm clock.
is life good?
always.
if someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
sure why not.
do you think anyone has feelings for you?
nope! FOREVER ALONE!
what's a boyfriend?
do you believe exes can be friends?
yup!
do you eat breakfast daily?
usually or atleast i try to.
is green your favorite color?
nope, but i do like.
is there anyone you couldn’t live without?
yup.
who were you with the last time you went to the movie theater?
a bunch of fuckin people to watch paranormal 2 ...
what do you usually do when the clock turns 11:11?
probably doing some shit.
do you like to cuddle?
it's cute.
do you like your cell phone?
yes i do!
do you prefer to call or text?
text / bbm, hehe
do you think someone misses you?
nope.
do you love where you live?
i love that it's not too far from the city & the beach.
what were you doing 12 am last night?
falling asleep.
would you go out in public looking like you do now?
sure, i just came back from trixia's anyway.
so, what do you want for your birthday?
it passed already!
has anyone ever sang to you?
yes.. hahah oh my.
do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?
doubt it. forever alone!
how was your weekend?
just started. bummed out with 3 of my girls so that was nice!
do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
yup!
how do you feel right now?
tiredd.
does any part of your body hurt right now?
mmm nope.
are you a mean person?
shit, i can be.
interested in anyone at the moment?
nope. forever alone yet again!
so, what if you married the last person you kissed?
hahah, i mean like he was cute..
have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
i guess you could say that.
is there someone you want to fix things with?
yeah. sigh.
do you plan on moving out within the next year?
nope.
what are you listening to at the moment?
the sound of central air.
what color shirt are you wearing?
2010 shirt with my prom hoodie, haha.
can you leave the house without makeup?
sure.
do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
i don't think so, lol
what was the first thing you did when you woke up?
turn off my alarm clock.
is life good?
always.
if someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
sure why not.
do you think anyone has feelings for you?
nope! FOREVER ALONE!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
oh holiday season once again.. christmas time, winter = cold = cuddling, & new years.. the best time to have a boo / boyfriend and the time i really wish i had one.. hahaha i'm so pathetic! but no really, i do miss getting all excited .. & trying to figure out what to get him. blahblah all that shit. okay i don't know what i'm saying. it's just mad cold and it's getting to my head.. haha
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Life's fckin good. With or without you. I'm happy. I got the people I need and the ones that matter. I'm having fun. I'm living life. I'm doing good. Things are finally falling back together and it's sad that you're not a part of it anymore. I hope you're doing swell though. Wish you all the best, seriously.
Friday, December 3, 2010
because michelle's survey posts tempted me & i'm procrastinating from getting ready for tonight's festivities!
1. are you one of those people who never drink soda?
it's rare.. usually only when i'm at a family party.
2. think back five months ago, were you single?
mmm... yah.
3. is there one person you look at and automatically smile?
hehe yeah!
4. you think “i love you” are strong words?
very strong.
5. when was the last time you laughed really hard?
thanksgiving break w/ the girls & tribe.
6. are you counting down for anything?
tonight should be a good night, winter break & cwistmas!
7. favorite color?
black / grey... even though those aren't really colors. i like everything actually.
8. what grade is the last person you texted in?
college freshman.
9. do you like your hair?
i have a bittersweet relationship with it.
10. do you have clothes that belong to other people?
haha a couple.
11. is anyone mad at you?
i hope not..
12. today, would you rather go forward a week or back?
week forward please!
13. have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
mhm.
14. is there someone you don’t ever want to be out of your life?
of course.
15. are you currently looking forward to anything?
tonight, winter break, & christmas man!
16. will this weekend be a good one?
it's ending soon, but i hope i'll be having a good weekend.
17. what’s something you really want right now?
things go back to normal.
18. is there a guy that knows everything about you?
ehhh, not really.
19. has anybody ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
yeah... i don't know why though haha
20. would you rather have long or short hair?
long hair beauty!
21. would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
just to relive some good times, but not change anything that happened.
22. are you open about your feelings or closed off?
closed off most of the time.
23. has the last person you kissed ever made you cry?
nopee.
24. have you realized anything lately?
a lot of things i've realized.
25. would you be shocked if the last person you kissed texted you right now?
um, yeah! sheesh, then i'd be souped hahah
26. do you spend time with the same people always or new people?
it varies i guess?
27. are you the type that would rather stay at other people’s houses or have them at yours?
i think it depends on my mood but usually stay at someone's house.
28. when is the last time you were truly happy with your life?
summer 2010.. but i'm always happy =)
who’s the last person you talked to about sex?
i believe lauren?
are you stubborn?
i've had my times.
if you took a drug test right now, would you pass?
yup!
who was the last person to be on a bed with you?
i slept next to my papadukez last night, haha
do you tend to hold a grudge?
nope. waste of time.
what’s a few facts about the last person that talked to you?
black hair. filipino dad tummy. my nigga.
has anyone called you perfect before?
i think so?
what would happen if you had a baby with the last person you kissed?
the sex would probably be amazing. LOL just kidding um, we'd have some pretty light skinned babies.
where is the biggest scar on your body?
on my index finger.
have you ever been told you were amazing?
yeah... & again i do not know why.
would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?
i mean, i would try to avoid that, but eh, Heaven only knows.
what was the last thing you had to drink?
water.
are you trying to avoid liking somebody at the moment?
nope.
what would you do if there was a killer in your house?
um i think i'd lock my room then call all my fam members on the phone to tell them.. oh & call the popo!
if you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?
nope. everything happens for a reason.
do you get along with girls?
only the ones i like.
think of the last person who said i love you, do you think they meant it?
i don't remember who it was :( lol
have you ever kissed anyone with a tattoo?
mm nope don't think so.
have you ever kissed someone you weren’t dating?
yeah.
what was the last thing you cried about?
some shit that happened & got fed up about it.
who was the last girl you talked to?
trixie i think?
do you know anyone who drinks a lot?
yeup.
do you have any facial piercings?
nah.
is there anyone holding a grudge against you?
i hope not.
would you ever get plastic surgery?
as much as i hate shit on my body, nope.
what were you afraid of the most when you were a kid?
i'm not too sure, lol
do you ever miss your past?
time to time.
do you miss the last person you kissed?
no.. hahah
how have you felt today?
quite good, thank you.
are you nice to the people you dislike?
well i'm not gonna be rude, but i'm not gonna be fake.
you kissed someone today, didn’t you?
nope.
do you have any plans for the weekend?
party. work on project. maybe shop. & church.
do you know how it feels to be cheated on?
holla if you got me and fuck you if you had me.
what are you doing for your next birthday?
well i recently turned 18.. so far i had a sleepover & dinner with my girls & tonight i'll be partying it up. weee.
someone tells you that your beautiful, you say?
...... shut up, do you wanna die.
what are you looking forward to?
i feel like this question was asked like a million times!
are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone?
not right noww.
are you in a good mood right now?
i'm goood.
do you like to make the first move?
no, haha.
did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?
nope. aw i miss those nights!
when was the last time you completely broke down?
it wasn't really a break down but the last time i cried to my friend is probably the closest thing to that.
do you swear often?
yeah, i kind have a foul mouth -_-
would you go out in public looking the way you do?
yeah.
are you listening to any music?
nah, pops is watching tv.
is your hair long enough to put in a ponytail?
lol yeah.
what are you thinking about right now?
that i should really go get ready for tonight.
do you get irritated easily?
kinda sorta not really. depends on my mood.
does anyone call you babe?
no. aw i miss that too, haha.
would you ever get a tattoo?
yup!
do you like taking walks?
if i'm in the mood.
could you go the rest of your life without doing any drugs?
yeah.
are you happier now than you were last year?
um, i'm not sure. i think i was going thru less back then tho.
would you rather be a blonde or a brunette?
brunette!
1. are you one of those people who never drink soda?
it's rare.. usually only when i'm at a family party.
2. think back five months ago, were you single?
mmm... yah.
3. is there one person you look at and automatically smile?
hehe yeah!
4. you think “i love you” are strong words?
very strong.
5. when was the last time you laughed really hard?
thanksgiving break w/ the girls & tribe.
6. are you counting down for anything?
tonight should be a good night, winter break & cwistmas!
7. favorite color?
black / grey... even though those aren't really colors. i like everything actually.
8. what grade is the last person you texted in?
college freshman.
9. do you like your hair?
i have a bittersweet relationship with it.
10. do you have clothes that belong to other people?
haha a couple.
11. is anyone mad at you?
i hope not..
12. today, would you rather go forward a week or back?
week forward please!
13. have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
mhm.
14. is there someone you don’t ever want to be out of your life?
of course.
15. are you currently looking forward to anything?
tonight, winter break, & christmas man!
16. will this weekend be a good one?
it's ending soon, but i hope i'll be having a good weekend.
17. what’s something you really want right now?
things go back to normal.
18. is there a guy that knows everything about you?
ehhh, not really.
19. has anybody ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
yeah... i don't know why though haha
20. would you rather have long or short hair?
long hair beauty!
21. would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
just to relive some good times, but not change anything that happened.
22. are you open about your feelings or closed off?
closed off most of the time.
23. has the last person you kissed ever made you cry?
nopee.
24. have you realized anything lately?
a lot of things i've realized.
25. would you be shocked if the last person you kissed texted you right now?
um, yeah! sheesh, then i'd be souped hahah
26. do you spend time with the same people always or new people?
it varies i guess?
27. are you the type that would rather stay at other people’s houses or have them at yours?
i think it depends on my mood but usually stay at someone's house.
28. when is the last time you were truly happy with your life?
summer 2010.. but i'm always happy =)
who’s the last person you talked to about sex?
i believe lauren?
are you stubborn?
i've had my times.
if you took a drug test right now, would you pass?
yup!
who was the last person to be on a bed with you?
i slept next to my papadukez last night, haha
do you tend to hold a grudge?
nope. waste of time.
what’s a few facts about the last person that talked to you?
black hair. filipino dad tummy. my nigga.
has anyone called you perfect before?
i think so?
what would happen if you had a baby with the last person you kissed?
the sex would probably be amazing. LOL just kidding um, we'd have some pretty light skinned babies.
where is the biggest scar on your body?
on my index finger.
have you ever been told you were amazing?
yeah... & again i do not know why.
would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?
i mean, i would try to avoid that, but eh, Heaven only knows.
what was the last thing you had to drink?
water.
are you trying to avoid liking somebody at the moment?
nope.
what would you do if there was a killer in your house?
um i think i'd lock my room then call all my fam members on the phone to tell them.. oh & call the popo!
if you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?
nope. everything happens for a reason.
do you get along with girls?
only the ones i like.
think of the last person who said i love you, do you think they meant it?
i don't remember who it was :( lol
have you ever kissed anyone with a tattoo?
mm nope don't think so.
have you ever kissed someone you weren’t dating?
yeah.
what was the last thing you cried about?
some shit that happened & got fed up about it.
who was the last girl you talked to?
trixie i think?
do you know anyone who drinks a lot?
yeup.
do you have any facial piercings?
nah.
is there anyone holding a grudge against you?
i hope not.
would you ever get plastic surgery?
as much as i hate shit on my body, nope.
what were you afraid of the most when you were a kid?
i'm not too sure, lol
do you ever miss your past?
time to time.
do you miss the last person you kissed?
no.. hahah
how have you felt today?
quite good, thank you.
are you nice to the people you dislike?
well i'm not gonna be rude, but i'm not gonna be fake.
you kissed someone today, didn’t you?
nope.
do you have any plans for the weekend?
party. work on project. maybe shop. & church.
do you know how it feels to be cheated on?
holla if you got me and fuck you if you had me.
what are you doing for your next birthday?
well i recently turned 18.. so far i had a sleepover & dinner with my girls & tonight i'll be partying it up. weee.
someone tells you that your beautiful, you say?
...... shut up, do you wanna die.
what are you looking forward to?
i feel like this question was asked like a million times!
are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone?
not right noww.
are you in a good mood right now?
i'm goood.
do you like to make the first move?
no, haha.
did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?
nope. aw i miss those nights!
when was the last time you completely broke down?
it wasn't really a break down but the last time i cried to my friend is probably the closest thing to that.
do you swear often?
yeah, i kind have a foul mouth -_-
would you go out in public looking the way you do?
yeah.
are you listening to any music?
nah, pops is watching tv.
is your hair long enough to put in a ponytail?
lol yeah.
what are you thinking about right now?
that i should really go get ready for tonight.
do you get irritated easily?
kinda sorta not really. depends on my mood.
does anyone call you babe?
no. aw i miss that too, haha.
would you ever get a tattoo?
yup!
do you like taking walks?
if i'm in the mood.
could you go the rest of your life without doing any drugs?
yeah.
are you happier now than you were last year?
um, i'm not sure. i think i was going thru less back then tho.
would you rather be a blonde or a brunette?
brunette!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
i would be lying if i said i didn't miss you or if i said i wasn't hurt or if i said i didn't care. in fact, i miss all the shit we did. how could i not be hurt? and of course i'll always care about you.
but enough is enough. it's really an unhealthy cycle that i've been letting myself go through time after time. i was too scared to walk away before, but this time i've had enough. it's about time to really put into action what i've been saying & thinking all along. the excuses i've made up don't cut it anymore and if i keep trying to hold on, the more i'll hurt myself.
but hey, i believe after all this, i'm stronger and indeed smarter. i really feel like i learned my lesson and it's a mistake i really don't plan on repeating over again *crosses fingers*
& to be honest, i'm doing just fine. i'm living life and moving on with it. i don't have any time to waste on something that is insignificant right now. things happen for a reason. what's meant to be will find it's way. there's a reason why i'm going thru this right now & hopefully things will go back to normal some day, but for now, i'm happily satisfied strictly doing me and barely having any communication.
but enough is enough. it's really an unhealthy cycle that i've been letting myself go through time after time. i was too scared to walk away before, but this time i've had enough. it's about time to really put into action what i've been saying & thinking all along. the excuses i've made up don't cut it anymore and if i keep trying to hold on, the more i'll hurt myself.
but hey, i believe after all this, i'm stronger and indeed smarter. i really feel like i learned my lesson and it's a mistake i really don't plan on repeating over again *crosses fingers*
& to be honest, i'm doing just fine. i'm living life and moving on with it. i don't have any time to waste on something that is insignificant right now. things happen for a reason. what's meant to be will find it's way. there's a reason why i'm going thru this right now & hopefully things will go back to normal some day, but for now, i'm happily satisfied strictly doing me and barely having any communication.
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