I am tired. Emotionally tired. If I had the money, I would have bought myself a ticket out of Jersey and made my way to either Cali or Florida for spring break but I obviously don't have that kind of money. I'm in a dire need of a nice, relaxing vacation. Somewhere to sit back and relax. Take a fuckin breather of all the shit I've been feeling. I am so tired of the bullshit that people bring. I am so sick and tired of myself. I hate having this feeling of self pity. Nobody understands and nobody will probably ever understand the way I feel so why bother even trying to explain to a friend? I'll only be wasting my breath. I'm tired of always worrying about things that do & don't matter. I am always wishing, hoping, wondering, and dreaming but I never have the guts to do what I got to do in reality. I need to find all the confidence I lack so much of.

The shit you say to me has never really phased me because honestly, I really do not give a fck but when you mention something and say it as if I should be insulted? Oh hell no. When shit hits me a bit deeper than usual and picks right at my insecurities.. that shit is a no go. I will not let someone else make me feel as if I am less of a person than I am. I know my own self worth and I don't need anybody else trying to bring me down. I am the only person who will bring myself down because I am the only person who will physically and mentally improve myself on my own time.

I am on my own path of self improvement. I will pave my own way.